Suicide can be be a really sad topic, but it is one that needs to be more openly discussed. When talking to people who have experienced the loss of a loved one, so often they will say, "Why didn't I see it?". While it is never a loved one's fault, it is important to educate yourself on the signs that could help you save a life.
Every year, millions of people struggle with thoughts of ending their lives and too often their struggles go unnoticed by those around them until it is too late. By learning and recognizing the signs of someone who might be contemplating suicide, we can take steps to offer support and potentially save a life.
Understanding and recognizing the warning signs of suicide is crucial because it can actually mean the difference between life and death. Sometimes these signs are very subtle, and rarely do people directly ask for help. They might also deny that they need your help, and although we might hate to admit it, it is often easier to believe someone when they say, "I'm okay".
What should you look for?
While everyone is different, certain behaviors or changes in mood can be a red flag that someone might be considering suicide. Here are some of the common signs to watch for:
Direct statements: The most obvious, but saying this like "I wish I were dead", or "everyone would be better off without me" are clear indicators of suicidal thoughts.
Indirect statements: Sometimes it might be something like, "I can't take it anymore" or "There is no point in going on", which can also be a sign.
Withdrawal or Isolation: People who are feeling suicidal often pull away from friends or family. They may stop showing up for things like school or work, or activities that normally they really enjoy. They may become unusually quiet.
Drastic Mood Changes: While depression is often associated with suicide, in some cases people who have made a decision to end their life may seem like they have had a lift in their mood. This can be very deceptive for friends or family who think, "well maybe they are feeling better". Going from very sad to very happy can actually be a serious sign that they have made a plan to commit suicide.
Starting or Increasing Substance Use: Starting or increasing the use of drugs and/or alcohol can be a coping mechanism and a sign they are trying to "numb" themselves to their pain. This can also put someone at risk for accidental overdoses.
Expressions of Hopelessness: Hopelessness is one of the strongest indicators of suicidal thoughts. When someone feels that their situation will never improve and life is not worth living, they may see suicide as their only option.
Giving Away Possessions: If someone suddenly starts giving away prized possessions or making arrangements for their belongings, this could be a sign they are planning to end their life. This or other signs of "putting their affairs in order" should be cause for concern.
Saying Goodbye: People contemplating suicide might start saying goodbye to loved ones either directly or indirectly. They may do this with a latter, text, phone call or just saying goodbye to you in a way that feels different or as if it is for the last time. They may apologize for things in the past that you may think are long forgotten or settle.
What should you do?
If you recognize any of these signs you wold take action immediately. Here are some things you can do:
Talk to them!! Approach the person with compassion, empathy and genuine concern. Ask them directly if they are thinking about ending their life! Contrary to common myths, asking about it does not plant the idea in their head. It shows they you are willing to listen and that you are not scared to hear the truth about where they are emotionally.
Listen without judgement. Let them express their feelings, don't try to find solutions right away. Don't dismiss their problems as trivial or "not that big a deal". This is the easiest way to shut down the conversation.
Help them to seek Professional Help. Help them get in touch with a resource that can provide them with mental health assistance. Even helping them by sharing the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention's hotline: Call or text 988 or text TALK to 741741
Contact 911 if Necessary. If you are worried that the person might be in danger, don't leave them alone and call 911. It might seem scary, but it is better to ensure they get the help they need immediately.
Recognizing the signs of suicidal thoughts can be challenging, but it can be just as impactful as learning how to do CPR. Your action in a time of crisis for someone can truly save their life. Don't be afraid to have uncomfortable conversations with those who might need you most. Need support in helping someone you know? Reach out to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention for support.
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